November ‘23 Recap

episode SUMMARY:

In this episode of the Books for Men podcast, Douglas Vigliotti recaps the month of November 2023, expresses gratitude to listeners for their support, and encourages them to spread the word about the podcast. He then proceeds to summarize the three books discussed in the previous month's episodes. The first book is Vigliotti's own novel, Tom Collins, which explores the theme of consumption versus creation. The second book is The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware, which delves into the regrets people have about life on their deathbeds. The third book is City of Thieves by David Benioff, a historical fiction novel set during the Nazi siege of Leningrad. The host shares his thoughts and favorite quotes from each book and encourages listeners to listen to the podcast episodes or read the books themselves. He concludes by providing information on accessing full transcripts and the monthly newsletter at BooksforMen.org and reminds listeners they can connect with him on Instagram @douglasvigliotti.

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Welcome back to Books for Men, a podcast to inspire more men to read and bring together men who do. So as always, when I start these recap episodes, I like to first just say thank you to everybody who has listened to the podcast and continues to support the podcast in any of the various ways that you could do so. Most importantly, as you always hear me say word of mouth. So if you've told a friend or a family member, then I can't thank you enough because that is truly the best way that you can support the show. And considering that it's the holidays and you'll be around friends and family, maybe you could do so this year. That would mean a lot to me. And of course, if you're a regular listener and you have doubled down on that support by rating or subscribing or following or whatever on any of the podcast platforms that you listen to this on, then I can't thank you enough because that helps more people find the show.

(01:11)

And it again, goes a long way in supporting and spreading awareness, which is again, to inspire more men to read. So thank you, thank you, thank you. And of course, if you want to connect with me, probably the best way to do so is on Instagram @douglasvigliotti. It's the only social media that I have. I usually say this at the end of every episode, but just in case you're tuning out before the end, there you have it. That's how you can get in touch with me. And on that note, let's jump right into the recap for November 2023. And it was a typical month, three books. There were two novels in one nonfiction book, and yes, the first work of fiction was by yours truly. I shared my novel Tom Collins because it came out two years ago, November 2nd, 2021. So in honor of its anniversary, I said, why not share it on the podcast?

(02:08):

As I alluded to during that episode, it was probably one of the harder shows for me to do because talking about your own work could be difficult at times, but I think I did a decent job with it. So the novel is about a salesguy who sleeps with an older woman only to find out five days later that she is married to his new boss. Then he has to go on a work trip with both of them. It ultimately has to decide what matters most for his future. So it's fun, it's edgy, it's unbridled, but the book is about much more than that. And I think I did a pretty good job with that in the episode, talking about the major thematic element, which is really about consumption versus creation and the power of creating things in your life, whether that be a family, a business, or a creative endeavor.

(02:56)

Creation can take on many different forms in our lives. It's not just relegated to what we traditionally think of it as, which is a book, a movie, or a song. It could be. And I definitely think that those are important, but there are other aspects of creation because, by its definition, all that means is, not there, there. Zero to one, right? It needs you to exist. The consumable things don't really need you to exist. What this story attempts to do is use the cocktail Tom Collins as a motif for everything consumable in our lives and consequently disposable, but worse at the expense of the more meaningful aspects of life, the things that we create. As one of the characters that you will meet in the book if you do choose to read, it says, “Don't kill yourself with consumption, kid.” If you are interested, I definitely go back and listen to that episode.

(03:56)

Or even better, you can listen to the entire book for free on the podcast, Slightly Crooked: Good Stories, Told Well, which is available on any podcast platform. So the second book of the month was a nonfiction book, and it was called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, and it was by Bronnie Ware. And so it was a book about the top five regrets confessions people have about their lives while lying on their deathbeds from somebody who knows. Bronnie Ware spent a lot of time as a palliative care nurse, so for people who don't know what that is, basically somebody who cares for people who are dying, which gives her a pretty unique perspective on the subject matter. And it was actually a blog that turned into a book back when that was a thing and sort of possible kind of is still today. But there was definitely a time period for that when it was more prominent.

(04:51)

If you are short on time and don't want to read the book, you can just search The Top five Regrets of the Dying and her blog will come up and you'll be able to read all about them. Or you could go back and listen to the episode that I did this month. Of course, my favorite quote from that book is, “Finding the courage to act or surrender will never be as painful as lying on a deathbed with regrets.” I do feel there is a big kernel of truth in that quote, one that is sort of painful and hits you right where it hurts. But at the same time, as I already mentioned, I loved it. Just like I love this book and it's been on my bookshelf for a very long time. Every time I see that spine, it really helps put things into perspective, and I think that this book will do that for you.

(05:36)

Alright, so now our final book of the month was another novel, and it was by David Benioff, probably most known for his adaptation of Game of Thrones. It is probably up there with one of the greatest television shows of all time, at least in a popular sense and viewership-wise. So this novel is called City of Thieves, and it came out in 2008, so before he did the show. And I comment on that in the actual episode, but it's a historical fiction novel, really a coming-of-age story. It's a novel about two young men's quest to find a dozen eggs for a Russian colonel during the Nazi siege of Leningrad in World War ii. And so it's a really unique plot, but it's so freaking good, and I speak very highly of the book in the episode, and that's for good reason because I just enjoy the hell out of the novel.

(06:32)

I think it's put together extremely well. I also will say that I don't think there is a better book potentially for Books for Men. It's very much a guy's novel, so to speak, because the main character is a young man at the time, 17, and it's about his coming of age really during this very desolate dark time when Leningrad was under siege by the Nazis, as I've already mentioned. And I actually pulled out one quote that I thought would help to signify the journey that that protagonist goes on. Lev is his name, and he says, “I could mouth all sorts of pieties to convince you that I'm a sensitive man and I believe that I am a sensitive man. Even so that night I felt nothing but exhilaration about my actions. I had acted against all expectations against my own history of cowardice.” And so it might be intuitive or not so intuitive but I love this because it shows the character realizing that he needed to step up when he needed to step up.

(07:39)

And I think that in life we all have those moments where we are called to action and we have a decision on whether we step up, or fall to our own history of cowardice potentially. And sad to think about, but how many times have we been called to action potentially in our lives and not taken the call? I think that this story could be a really empowering one, but at the same time, it's very entertaining and very funny in many ways. But I'm not going to share any more about it. If you're interested in it, just like I said about the other two episodes, go back and listen to this one or perhaps even better read the book. Alright, so that's all I've got. I hope you enjoyed the episode as always. As I mentioned at the top of this episode, if you did, please remember to share it with a friend or a family member. I'm not going to go into great detail with all the normal stuff I end with because I opened with it. But I will just remind you that if you want more information, you could always visit BooksforMen.org where you can get full transcripts for any episode. As well as sign up for the newsletter, which is a monthly roundup of every episode complete with full book and author information, all the best quotes, as well as newsletter-only book recommendations. So again, you could do that at BooksforMen.org.